Good men/ Good women (?)

Last night, my bf told me how he has a little argument with his friends about how to be a good man.

Some people said that being a good man simply means you're being a good father and good husband, provide for your family in a good manner. Of course it is correct for married man, for a father generally. I hate lousy, irresponsible father who knows how to 'make the children' but do not have any idea about how to raise them.

And for woman, I heard some people said that a woman is not a woman yet before raising a child.

Yes, yes, those are good roles for both women and men. But, but.. How if we do not married yet, if we do not have kids yet to raise. Is it make us less good?

Unfortunately, in this (shitty (?)) country, most of the people think like that.

How naive and superficial thinking.

I'm not opposing marriage. I want to get married, someday, in the future. But if I cannot get marriage right now (I'm 26 yo fyi), or my boyfriend (he's 3x fyi) doesn't  want to get married right now, it doesn't make us a bunch of failed people.

No.

Jesus didn't get married. St. Paul, St. John, didn't get married. Mother Theresa as well.

They didn't get married, and should we call them not good men/good women?
They are much better, 100 times better than many married people having 10 kids but their life is useless as fuck and never contribute to society.

Married or not married. Having child or childless. It's not a proper parameter to determine whether someone is good or not. Whether they are success or not.

Living with a good purpose (vision) to be useful for someone else in this shitty world, that makes us a good wonderful person. Trying everyday to be less self-centered, to share what we have to other people (whether it is our family, our kids, or somebody we do not know), that makes us a good wonderful person.

I hope people will stop defining what good person means by the 'marriage/having kids' criteria.
No, it is wrong.

I refuse to getting married, if I'm not fully ready, if I know that I cannot be a good mother to my kids.
It's better to take our time, take it slowly, and learn.

I respect my boyfriend's decision as well. I never ask him about marriage stuff. Because I know where he stands right now. He is not ready, and asking him constantly doesn't make him more ready. If we are getting married now, I mean today, we can assure that we will be terrible partners and then definitely will be terrible parents.

I think, it's time for us to give more respect to other people's choices in their lives.
Stop making judgement about other people's business.
Nobody should gives too much damn about how we have to live it.